Being Different: You Are Not Alone

Despite that we are being told constantly that we shouldn't care about what people say, the truth is that it DOES affect in one way or the other. It affects because it is human nature to feel approved. Approval make us feel included and feeling included make us belong. We aren't made to be isolated individuals but individuals inside a community.

Now, you might be thinking about those who go against it all and think my words are incorrect. Even though these people seem to go on their own, the truth is they are not alone in the journey the chose; they just haven't found their way to their community.

When I was in school, I felt like I didn't belong. I was a "law abiding teenager" (which is uncommon); I wouldn't do things I believed were stupid choices, always measuring the consequences of those choices. I was called dumb for not joining. Passionate about learning, with a huge imagination, always dreaming high, full of ideas, but they were called silly by others. I studied hard because I wanted scholarships so my mom wouldn't worry about not being able to pay my school- a hunting worry. I was hated quite a lot because of that; my peers simply didn't understand the reasons behind my "nerdiness".  I wouldn't help my classmates cheat during an exam and I knew it would be uncomfortable to deal with them after class being called names, getting shoes thrown my way and even not letting me out of the classroom. Many of my ideas were thrown to the curb as one makes a paper ball and throws it to the trash. It was frustrating and confusing. I thought maybe I was doing something wrong because everything seemed to be against me but it was in my nature; I couldn't rub it off or perhaps I was very strong willed without meaning it. I know of people who are amazing, talented and choose to lower all of their selves just to belong. People who choose to dumb themselves before being rejected.

When I started University everything changed. My classmates were like me. I was still the more nerdy of the class but I was not made fun. Instead, I was being seek for advice, for help, people wanted to hear my ideas and be part of them and I grew more in that time than I did in so many years with my school peers. The difference? I found my community. I wasn't flying solo anymore.

After many years and circumstances that shaped my life into a muddy situation in which I was stuck, I knew I needed to leave my birth country. Who I was just didn't fit well anymore so I end up in Canada. After a week of living here I knew this was my place. That was 8 years ago. During these 8 years I have still feel strongly about that thought and this week I finally became a canadian citizen. It hasn't been easy but it has been gratifying and I have been blessed in many many ways, big and small. I'm flourishing as a person and as an artist. My skills have found their way to help others through Reveal Your True Beauty. I'm blessed but I know I'm still growing and the path is long with bumps on the way. I'm not scared about that. Sometimes overwhelmed, sometimes stressed, sometimes completely ecstatic but not afraid.

Take a deep breath, close your eyes and listen to your soul. But really listen to it, in humility and honest truth with yourself. What does it say? Ask questions: What do I truly believe in and why?

It's easy to feel like you don't belong in your own little world, city or even country. Your views of life clash against those of your peers and you feel rejection. You might feel that perhaps you are wrong because everything and everyone around you tells you that. Take a deep breath, close your eyes and listen to your soul. But really listen to it, in humility and honest truth with yourself. What does it say? Ask questions: What do I truly believe in and why?

Now here's the thing: if it's something you truly believe, educate yourself. Learn about what you believe and learn about the opposite too, because being blinded to other points of view make you a foolish person; but learning other perspectives brings wisdom and understanding.

Being blinded to other points of view make you a foolish person; but learning other perspectives brings wisdom and understanding.

Now seek. Seek like-minded people. Find your community. The beauty of living with internet is that you can do it from your own home but don't forget to take the trip and talk too. Living it is another thing and you learn more from the experience. 

You are not alone; just in the wrong place. If everything and everyone around you works against you, break free, find your solace- Find your happiness. Find your True Beauty.

Revealing Katie: Finding Your True Beauty On Your Teens

Hair and Makeup by Kada from Bombay Beauty Loft. Styling by Something 2 Wear Boutique

Katie arrived to her session accompanied by her mother Glenna. When I saw Glenna I couldn't stop my eyes from looking at her beautiful ginger hair paired with the perfect red lipstick and the cat eyed black glasses she was wearing. All this, mixed with her personality made me feel like I was in front of a powerful woman that came out of a Fitzgerald book and that she could be interpreted by Meryl Streep if they ever made movie of it. Yes, she is that amazing.

Katie on the other hand, is on the quiet side. You can tell she plans every word carefully before she speaks which I like to call wise. Learning to control your tongue to think before you speak does not come easily for most of us, specially as teenagers but she nails it. She does not rush but she's not slow. She is eloquent and proper. She is definitely smart and has a lovely laugh; no doubt on that!

I identified a lot with her because I saw me in her when I was her age. She describes herself as: 

Charismatic, Optimistic, Empathetic and shy. I am very confident in who I am, I just don't show it as much. I am very artistic and imaginative".

To which, by getting to know her, I absolutely agree.

When Glenna mentioned how much she wanted Katie to see and believe how beautiful she is, my moms words came back to me: "you've always been beautiful; it was time you started seeing it yourself that way too". 

At the reveal Katie, her mom and family were speechless for a while, just taking it all in. Then her family couldn't stop reassuring Katie that she was captured in the same way the see her. Absolutely beautiful!

From my side, I can only say one thing:

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

A Storyteller With A Camera

Special thanks to Serena from Italy for this beautiful illustration!

It has taken a significant amount of people telling me the same thing the last couple of months for me to finally get it. I'm a storyteller.

My brother wrote a comment on one of my blog posts:

"Is wonderful how you write, you've always had the 

gift to show the world in a beautiful way regardless of  

the medium."

- "Fela, didn't you know this already?! Is kind of obvious!".

I know, I know. But first let me explain why it took so long to hit me. I'm a bit of a weird combination; I can be very creative (out of the box) but at the same time be IN the box, full on. Which I've been told is rare for an artist. My head is processing storytelling and portrait as 2 different things:

- Storytelling goes in my procrastinated box of "Writing"

- True Beauty goes in my current box of "Photography" 

Therefore, since it has been categorized, in my head, Storytelling is not part of the same box where Portrait goes, so is dismissed. I can be non-artistic like that...

But put me inside the Writing box or the Photography box and my imagination and creativity goes wild, jumping into an infinite world of possibilities; kind of a Narnia effect (the world inside the wardrobe).

So, I was completely oblivious to it, but people kept saying it and Storytelling started planting a seed in my Photography box and a lot of things started making sense, and my Photography world expanded more; kind of the world of Fantastica in "The Never-ending Story": the more you imagine, the bigger it gets (yeah... I'm applying my book geekiness right now if you have noticed...).

"If you were doing this unconsciously already, what's the difference now and why should I care?"- You may ask.

Well my friend, it makes a HUGE difference! 

First, it's a conscious decision now, which makes me more attentive to telling your story when I photograph you. I'll be able to discover and reveal more of your amazing self.

And second, but most importantly, I'll be able to tell YOU your story. I'll be able to tell you how amazing, strong and smart you are. I'll be able to tell YOU how, despite all the hardship in your life, you have been able to conquer it all and stand victorious in front of me with the courage (that is not found so easily) to make yourself vulnerable to me and my camera so that I may see it all and show it to you so that YOU may look at yourself and FINALLY realize, that you are standing pretty good in life, that God has shaped you into an AMAZING woman, that your body is just the shell that contains all your awesomeness and THAT my friend is not a bad thing. Not a bad thing at all.

Revealing Katie

As usual, my partner in crime aka HMUA (for hair and makeup artist) is Kada Issa from Bombay Beauty Loft. She knows exactly what I'm looking for and has the ability to enhance the beauty that's already there without over doing it. I love working with her so much!

But today's story is not about Kada but about Katie. As some of you know, each lady has to fill a form prior to their session on which they describe themselves and someone else (friend or relative) has to fill the other half. The purpose of it is to introduce me to who YOU are because if I don't know you, how can I bring your beauty out? The other reason is a healthy exercise to get an insight to what beauty others (friends, family) see inside of us. 

The day of our session Katie expressed how great the exercise had been, to the point that between her friend (who filled the other half of the form) and Katie, created a little chain were they would encourage other friends too by answering the same question. 

Styling by Studio Intent Boutique

I want to share what Katie's friend said about her because I believe it to be true from getting to know Katie:

"If I was to pick a color to describe Katie it would be yellow, the warm yellow of the sun. Not only is this color bright and cheery, but being the color of the sun it symbolizes so much more. Katie is bright like the sun, she is intelligent and has an amazing sense of humour. Even when it is cloudy, she is like that ray of sunshine beaming through the clouds, with her determination, drive and enthusiasm. She has an eye for beauty, not just in what she wears but with her knack for catching those moments of greatness through film. This woman has always been a force, a force of happiness, pride, beauty, intelligence and support in my own but also in many other people’s lives. Not only is she a beautiful person on the outside, but she has an incredibly beautiful soul and shines from within".

And who better than Katie to talk about her experience with the Reveal Your True Beauty Session:

Katie was simply wonderful. We laughed a lot that day and definitely felt the sunshine yellow warmth of her heart.